Jack Benny and Marilyn Monroe Routine

Marilyn Monroe: What about the difference in our ages?

Jack: Oh, it's not that big a difference. You're twenty-five and I'm thirty-nine.

Marilyn Monroe: I know, Jack. But what about twenty-five years from now when I'm fifty and you're thirty-nine?

Jack: Gee, I never thought of that.

Joey Bishop & Jack Benny On Carson’s 10th Anniversary Show

Mel Blanc & Jack Benny Classic Routine

Jack Benny & Gisele MacKenzie Violin Duet

5 One-Liners From Jack Benny

1. A cannibal is a guy who goes in the restaurant and orders the waiter.

2. Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.

3. I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early.

4. Give me golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner. Then you can keep the golf clubs and fresh air.

5. I went to see one of those X-rated pictures the other night. I couldn’t believe my eyes. So I stayed to see it a second time.

Jack Benny Kills Mel Blanc

Jack Benny and Liberace Routine

[Jack Benny arrives at Liberace's house.]

Liberace: What do we have for dinner?

Cook: We have some breast of flamingo and gazelle steaks.

Jack: Breast of flamingo and gazelle steaks?

Liberace: Would you like to stay for dinner, Jack?

Jack: Well, only if you have enough. I'd hate for you to run out to the zoo just for me.

Jack Benny on Groucho Marx’s “You Bet Your Life” 1955