2. Homosexuality in Russia is a crime punished by 7 years in prison locked up with other men. There is a 3 year waiting list.
3. I like American women. They do sexual things Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
4. The paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
5. Russia had two TV channels. One was propaganda. The other was a KGB officer telling you to "Turn back at once to Channel One."